Sep 28, · I Spent A Month Looking For Love On Military Dating Sites I took to Google to see if there was an online service for military dating. to anyone who says anything about PTSD! Happy 4th. Author: Sarah Sicard. Jan 08, · Hello everyone. I'm here because I just recently have started dating a man who is a combat veteran with PTSD. We've really hit it off and things seem to be going really well, and we recently had our first sexual experience together.
Share It was clear from rating very first date that my boyfriend Omri probably has post-traumatic stress disorder. We were at a jazz club in Jerusalem. I'm not sure what the sound was — a car backfiring, a cat knocking over trash can, a wedding party firing celebratory shots into the air. But whatever it was, the sound dating a military man with ptsd Omri to jump in his seat and tremble. He gazed up at me, his eyes wet, his pupils swollen like black olives. The noise clearly carried a different meaning for him, one I didn't understand.
Share It was clear from our very first date that my boyfriend Omri probably has post-traumatic stress disorder. We were at a jazz club in Jerusalem. I'm not sure what the sound was — a car backfiring, a cat knocking over trash can, a wedding party firing celebratory shots into the air. But whatever it was, the sound caused Omri to jump in his seat and tremble.
He gazed up at me, his eyes wet, his pupils swollen like black olives. The noise clearly carried a different meaning for him, one I didn't understand. He slowly took another puff of his cigarette, careful to steady his shaking hands.
The first time he shot a man dead, Omri told me, he cried. America's military systems actively discourages people from getting diagnosed and seeking treatment for PTSD because of the costs. They are unable to communicate, even with just little things. They've numbed themselves to the extent where they have difficulty experiencing emotion at all, even forming opinions. Having PTSD, just like any stigmatized mental health issue, can be difficult and isolating. Yet dating someone with PTSD can sometimes feel just as challenging.
At any rate, being in a romantic relationship with someone who has contributed firsthand to the atrocities of war is by no means a cakewalk. It requires a great deal of understanding. In my experience, combat vets largely believe they are undeserving of love. I do not know why this is. In our eyes, or at least in mine, they are selfless and valiant heroes deserving of so much more. These veterans do the unspeakable for the sake of their country, and the aftershocks of their violence unfortunately do not leave them once they get back home.
Beyond this, I would venture to say every combat vet has been touched by death. Each vet knows someone who was killed in the war they continued to fight, and there was likely someone they loved among those lost. A brother in the truest sense, in their eyes. In his words, anyone could have been killed. It could have been me. But hopefully, it will mean enough to him that you care enough to try.
I endure many a sleepless night because my vet does. But not once have I ever complained about getting punched in the head, alarmingly awakened by his blood-curdling scream, or being kept up most of the night by his muttering evil memories in his sleep. Where most women might silently protest, I do not. I endure these things because I almost feel a duty to; my vet spent 13 months in a desert so I could sleep safely at night.
This moves me to another point: Turtle with a broken leg slow. Whirlwind romances are not for people with PTSD. You have been through a terrible ordeal. Maybe even more than one. You are a strong survivor but you are also fragile. You have to be smart whom you give your heart to. A person can only take so much heartbreak in one lifetime. The more times your heart breaks the harder it gets to put it back together. I know this from experience.
Just take your time and get to know each other. Trust that gut of yours. Chances are your experiences have given you a new super intuition. Learn how to channel that.