May 31, · Is Dating Your Roommate Ever A Good Idea? So here’s the thing: people write us with all sorts of scenarios, often involving their roommates, their roommates’ significant others, and general relationships-when-you’re-living-in-an-apartment type questions. The other major player in this story, by the way, is my girlfriend Marie. We had been dating for almost two years now. Marie was pretty in a completely different way from Stevie: she was short and frail looking, like she'd break if you looked at her wrong, and in most situations she was completely shy and timid.
May 10th After months and months arf hunting every inch of London for the perfect place, you arrive in your new flat only to discover the stranger behind that quirky room ad is HOT. You get the idea. Arguments my roommates are dating of the children! Do they have to pick a side? Or do they just scurry away into their rooms and avoid eye contact with both of you for weeks? Dating your housemate is fun.
So even though I obviously notice Stevie's body, I always shut down those thoughts as soo as I get them. Stevie is one of my best friends and I'd never throw that away. Besides those little nagging thoughts, Stevie and I talked about everything. I knew her whole history, her dreams and fears, everything about her sex life, everything she thought about our mutual friends.
And she knew everything about me as well. We were completely open with each other and that's probably the main reason our friendship worked so well. But anyways. About four months after we moved in Stevie began seeing this guy. In of itself this was normal, Stevie dated pretty casually. The weird thing was that she was way out of his league. The guy--his name was Chase--was a complete loser. He was a short, skinny little guy, not very attractive, and he couldn't keep a job.
To boot he was annoying: He had no sense of humor either. Whenever he came over, I noticed that Stevie didn't really like talking to him any more than I did; she always suggested they watch a movie or something. Yet for some reason, she continued to see him. So I asked her about it. You're way out of his league you know. I just like the way he makes me feel inside. Stevie and I were always very straightforward with each other, but now it felt like she was hiding something.
I resolved to find out exactly what the appeal was. We had been dating for almost two years now. Marie was pretty in a completely different way from Stevie: But there was something beautiful in how small and breakable she was.
Anyways, Stevie and I decided it would be fun to have a double date night. I would invite Marie and she would invite Chase and we'd all watch a movie together. Our respective partners agreed, I bought snacks, and Stevie picked out a film. The movie itself was uneventful. Marie and I sat on the couch, and Chase and Stevie cuddled under a blanket while we watched Iron Man.
Afterwards it was pretty late so we all just went to bed. I woke up in the middle of the night to muffled moans and thumping coming from the other room. Stevie had had boyfriends before, but until now I'd never heard anything. Even though it was quiet, it sounded like Stevie was getting the fucking of her life, and there were no signs of it stopping soon. As my eyes adjusted, I noticed that Marie was wide awake beside me, her eyes fixed on the ceiling. I couldn't even guess how long she had been listening.
There was a strange expression on her face too--curiousity? She hadn't noticed me wake up. Eventually I groaned and rolled over to go back asleep. Marie stayed in her same position, still listening intently. I knew that she kept a journal, though I had never seen it, and I figured that she must have written about Chase in there somewhere.
So I waited until she left to go work out, and snuck into her room. It took me a while to find Stevie's journal, but after about 20 minutes of carefully going through her room I finally found it in her underwear drawer.
I opened it to the most recent entry. I'm still not able to stop seeing him. It's annoying! Every time I think I've made up my mind, I think about his cock. His beautiful, giant cock. No one has ever made me feel the way his cock does, and I really don't think anyone ever will. God I just wish it wasn't attached to that prick Chase.
I'll decide that I hate him, but as soon as we fuck I fall in love with him all over again. I just don't know what--" Suddenly I heard the key in the lock of the front door. I panicked, threw the journal back into her underwear drawer and closed it as quietly as possible, then slipped out of her room just in time.
Her face is still flushed, and her gym clothes look rumpled. I end up having to stay late at work that day, so I text her a heads up. Just let yourself in. I should be home around 6: I open my door to find Marie in deep conversation with Stevie. My roommate was in the middle of a sentence. Glad you made it. You can go hiking or stare at bodies of water together and have a deep meaningful talk, or maybe you just get naked and see where your brains down south lead you.
But, the most beautiful part of it all is when you get to go home and breathe into it and regain your sense of self. You decompress: I flipped my hair around so much I think I pulled a muscle in my arm. I turned into a brick wall. I shut down.
And at my lowest moment, I think I made a metaphor about toothpaste. All I could think of was that Pixar movie, Inside Out, and I was cursing those little assholes for spilling something hot and spicy all over my switchboard.
And then I realized that what I thought I could pass off as fun, was actually real feelings. But guess what? Gradually build a relationship with him by using your roommate status to your advantage. Meet Singles in your Area! Try Match. Step 1 Get feedback from other roommates. If other people are in the house, try to get their approval before making advances towards your roommate. Though gaining their approval is not necessary, their support will make any future relationship much easier and less costly, in the event that one chooses to move out over discomfort.
When they question if you like him, shrug and ask them what they would think if you chose to date him. Step 2 Do sweet things for him around the house to show your interest. Make him his favorite sandwich when you notice him staying up late studying.